True Wives Are the Heart of the Family

Unlike the popular believe that the wife is the “neck”  as to denote support to the man who is the head, I believe, that to the extraordinary gentleman (XG), his wife’s supporting role is better played as the heart of the family (Pr 31: 10-31).  In this discussion, I will like us to give a critical analysis to this subject, especially given the fact that notions of manipulation have leaked into the “neckhood” of the wife. Many women, instead of being a supporting neck to their husbands, are rather a manipulating neck. They do this by devising both direct and indirect ways of making sure that only what they desire is pursued by the family, instead of pursuing a comfortable compromise by parties.

As the heart is central to the living system of the human body, so is a true wife central to the life of a home (Pr 31, 10-31).  In most homes, the woman seems to be a unifying force between the husband and the children. Even when she lacks ideas about putting the family together, a good dinner table seems to do the trick. Women seem at most times to have unique access to both the heart of the children and the husband and as such are able to serve as great facilitators of the family life. Without them though daddies can be fun and loving, a mother’s touch still carries a difference.

Like the heart that pumps nutritious and warm blood to all the parts of the body, the wife supplies nutrition and warmth to all the members of the family including the head (Pr. 14, 21-22)  and she has her rest only in the comfort of her husband and children (Pr. 31: 15-19). As such, as an ill heart affects the countenance of the whole body, I believe the mood of the wife largely affects the mood of the house as a whole, yet the bad mood of a man can be shielded by the cheerful mood of the wife (Pr 14:1, Pr 21:1).

Additionally, the wife of an extraordinary gentleman must be one that the man can trust (Pr 31: 11-12) for a betrayal by her is as deadly as a heart attack! It is therefore unwise for a man to marry a woman whose integrity lacks confirmation in his spirit. The right woman for an XG must understand the times and what must be done. She must know when to be a girl, a lady, a woman, a wife and a mother; she must be excellent at switching these modes to preserve liveliness in the family and relationship.  This is the same way the heart varies its rate of beating to suit the current activity level of the body.

Above all things, the wife must be a woman of the right values and must be able to teach these to the children (Pr 31:1, Pr 1:8 RSV), for out of the heart flow all the issues of life (Pr 4:23). Though the man might instruct the child in the right way, it is the wife that at most times takes the time to teach the child the details of the instruction (as one of my lecturers once said, it is even the wife that teaches the male child to how to “pee”).

The true value of a heart lies in the intentions behind its actions and not in the actions themselves. In the same way, a true woman must be judged by the values on which she runs her life. For example, she must value internal beauty that comes from a true heart of humility beyond the external that comes from physical effort (1 Pe 3:1-4) and yet she must not neglect the external beauty for it might cast a shadow on the beauty within. A woman of true transcending character is a jewel of honour, however, when a woman is obsessed with her beauty and charm she is transient and is likely to make a shipwreck of the family life (Pr. 12:4).

I will like to know your view on this article and even your view on what makes a true wife. Please remember to leave your comments behind. Best of the day!


You Have God’s Chisel !

It is interesting , but i believe you will agree with me, that most of the time we are tempted to have our own perceptions and classifications of the man God is likely to use in achieving any purpose on earth.  Additionally, each of the categories that result from our classifications usually has a compelling reason why  we think we should not be the ones to be used. But if you are then of no use, you might as well be occupying important space that can be used by someone “more useful”! Why won’t God just kick you out of the way?

The answer is simple; every single one of creation has a compelling reason to exist. It is like saying everybody has a value that is derived from his or her existence and this is many times called your purpose. We will call it your ministry. Why?, well this is because your purpose offers value or satisfaction directly or indirectly to someone and ultimately to God. In essence, you are God’s solution to someone’s challenge or problem.

Picture this; a man who is excited about coming to church decides to wear his all-white brand new suit. In his excitement he forgets to pick one of his ten handkerchiefs. He is shy to ask for help but on arrival at the church, he notices that the chairs are spotlessly clean. He lifts up his eyes to heaven and whispers “thank you Father”. The exciting part is that, you cleaned that particular chair (as  periodic volunteer  to the church). You were God’s solution to his challenge or problem. Some ministries can be that simple, even as simple as starting a blog with just an idea for a single post!

Being in ministry I believe is just a shorter form of saying you are a channel through which God supplies any of the various graces that other people. These people also include other Christians who need your service to function more properly in society and in the church. This is the more reason why no excuse is enough to deny your neighbor the love of supplying the grace he or she needs through you. You must identify and pursue your ministry!

A ministry is therefore any selfless undertaking that is evidently inspired by the Spirit of God and that leads to glorious results in the life of people and society at large. The total concept of ministry is encapsulated in Isaiah 61: 1-4. A ministry is the purpose for life that must be inspired by the Spirit of God and as such, one must be chosen and equipped for it (Isa 61:1). Don’t forget, every man has a purpose and thus a ministry.

The Holy Spirit communicates a man’s ministry to him in different forms. There are those who receive it through dramatically inspiring experiences such as visions and dreams like Gideon (Judges 6:11-22, Gen 37: 5-10, 45 :7,), others receive by authority through the laying on of hands (1Ti 4:14), others just see it in the word of God (Dan 9:2-27) and are moved to get it done. Yet still, others just have it as a passion for which they feel gifted to pursue (1 Sam 17: 23-54) l.

A ministry must however, offer one or a combination of spiritual, psychological, emotional, physical or even fiscal liberation, inspiration or healing (Isa 61:1), reconciling people to the favor of their God so as to arouse their joy and praise of God. The ministry may also be of the form that reminds the people (both Christians and non-Christians) of their judgment and that of their enemies, bringing the Christians to the knowledge of their state of righteousness (Isa 61:2-3) and the need to continue in it and bringing non-Christians to the knowledge of the saving power of Christ Jesus. A ministry can also equip others to undertake exploits that bring glory to the name of God (Isa 61:4, Eph 4:11-12). The key word is this, it must bring glory to God. Therefore , I believe that any ministry that does not bring glory to God is either a selfish endeavor or is just evil.


Ministries are the chisels with which God carves his glory out of the lives of humans.

And you have God’s chisel!